There are many theories on why we dream and what our dreams mean. Some suggest that they are random, while others theorize that dreams are based on reality. Sometimes you dream about what was on your mind before you fell asleep. God help me if any of those are true, because my dreams serve as bizarre metaphors at best.

The dream that I woke from this morning, at least as much as I can recall, went like this:

I was standing on our frontmost porch, holding a big summer sausage in my arms and climbing a ladder that was hanging from the balcony. I recall that Mrs was upstairs, and I was taking the sausage to her. It was dawn.

“If anyone enjoys a good encased meat, it’s me” I said aloud to myself, as I prepared to scale the ladder. A noise of clattering and flapping came from underneath the porch, and I knew without a doubt that it must be the bats. This made perfect sense.

It made so much sense, in fact, that I then commented aloud “Ah, bats are always attracted to encased meats.”, then “You’re not getting my summer sausage, bats!” I unhooked the wood ladder from the balcony and swung it at the giant bats that were coming out of the house.

I went to the side porch, although I don’t remember why, and another bat came at me. I moved just enough and he ran into the wall. I remember thinking about how bats aren’t very smart. As I walked around the porch, toward the front of the house, where this all started, I glanced down to the end of the walkway leading to the house to see someone standing there.

As you do, when someone is standing in front of your house, I approached this man. He was very kind-looking, and dressed in casual dress with a tweed sports jacket. As I neared him, I could hear him counting backward.

“Three… two… one…” and with that, he activated a small device in his hands, that flashed a blue-white light.

“Did you just freeze time?” I asked, casually, as if this was something I’d seen before.

“Yes. When we go back, you’ll have 15 minutes before your children need to go to school”

This made perfect sense to me, and I confirmed by showing him the price tag on my summer sausage, which (I believe) read “4:15″ and said “Yes, right here it says so. This is from Wal-Mart. I don’t normally go there.”

That’s when I woke up. Do you have interpretations to share?