It’s Nippley In Here

Does it seem drafty in here to you?

I mean, on any given day you can hang meat up in this place but today seems overly Antarctic.

It’s colder and draftier and…bare…er.

Ah. It’s my dress. The only piece of clothing short enough to reveal the back of my knees when my ass hikes it up extra inch.

Or two.

Fantastic.

Now I get to spend all day trying to demurely yank the back of my dress down and the front UP.

Did I mention the front?

The girls are on display every time I inhale.

I’ve been trying to cover up, but I’m getting tired of messing with it and I distract easily. But, lucky me, the uber-observant assistant to my right keeps sounding a mighty *AHEM* before pointing to her chest and mouthing “Your dress is down again” every ten minutes.

I’m about ten minutes away from ripping the front of my top open and shimmying violently while screaming “Is this what you want?! IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT?” in her general direction!

But that’s crazy talk. I mean, that’s actually the opposite of what she wants.

Or is it?

No matter. I’d never walk around with my top open.

It’s too frickin’ cold!

And drafty.

Did I mention it’s drafty?

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