Dull As Saftey Scissors

Lately, I don’t feel mentally sharp.

Yesterday, I spent a good 30 seconds being very perturbed because the key fob to the car wouldn’t work…on the front door!

This morning I opened the door to leave and stopped before stepping outside. I couldn’t escape the feeling I’d forgotten something. Oh right, my SKIRT! (more…)

Don’t Let The Door Hit You…

It’s official. I’ve been traded to Team Twitchy.

If I can make it through this week I will never again be asked to make a “ressie!” That’s “reservation” in I’m-a-hip-female-PITA-boss speak.

I won’t have to get her lunch at the dumpling place, where standing in line is like being in a steam bath that ends with someone named “The Dumpling Nazi” just waiting to tear you a new one if you so much as look at her wrong, every Wednesday and Friday because she’s too busy working (read: shopping for shoes and talking on the phone about her kids). (more…)